Living with 290: The real walking Dead

I have been a RSO for many years now. I have over come so many adversities while growing up with disabilities. When I was young I couldn’t wait to become an adult so I wouldn’t be bullied anymore. I put my self through community college and learned a good trade. Got married and had a family.

And then I did the thing I never thought I couldn’t do. I was one of those. I used to think any one with that type of crime should be hung. I did everything in my power to make it right. But I had a spouse that always held things over my head. My disability leaves me at a disadvantage when it comes to relationships. But I m a dreamiest and I believe in doing what is right.

Pleaded guilty for two years but judge (along my attorney, no help. court appointed) gave me four to twenty years. Got my parole after the four years and two weeks before going home they took it away and gave me two more years (small town prosecutor got a favor of the parole board head guy). Lost my Mom in the four years then My brother in the two years. Never got to see them gain. Finally got out. In that amount of time my spouse was able to turned my kids against me, and my family. I wasn’t even allowed to go back to my town where I was sentenced. I was put into a Motel and still there. Cant rent. But my trade got me making good money. where I live and work shows that not all people are out to destroy you. There are some people that can see who you really are. Ive been trying to find a place to buy since I cant rent. But for respect to those who hate I wont buy where someone my loose home value because I live in the area. I was considered low risk both times when I got paroled.

If the registry is removed I could at least buy and not and not cause any issues where I am at. And also have some of the anxiety and embarrassment reduced. I have enough issues as it is with my disabilities any little bit would help.

So its funny in a way. Now that I’m an adult I wish I was a kid now. They say kids can be cruel, but grownups can be even crueler. I may be breathing and walking but with out Family and friends ( which I don’t have ether) I don’t feel truly alive. I’m the real walking dead. But I pray to God that this registry can be taken away and give us back just a little of our dignity, home and friends.

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To the OP:
I’ve been in your shoes. I remember being paroled and being stuck in a run down motel because I had no other options. I have both good and bad news: Things will be exactly as you believe. I know a ton of sex offenders who have absolutely shitty lives. They live in group homes, have no friends or family, do nothing with their lives, etc.
But, I also know plenty of people for whom being on the registry doesn’t even impact their daily life in the slightest.
But, it is 100% up to you. It is NOT up to the state/country repealing the registry. Get that nonsense out of your head. It’s probably not going to ever happen. Can changes be made? Sure. The team here does a great job advocating for us in court, but we are NOWHERE NEAR getting the registry removed. So, if you base your hope on that, you’re going to have problems.
Just accept that the registry is what it is and move on. Renting is an option. I’ve done it. Many other RSOs have as well. Buying is also an option but not if you live in fear of maybe kinda sorta bothering someone or affecting their property value. Get this idea of ‘respect’ for some vague potential neighbor and decide that you’re going to respect yourself enough to do what is best for you.
Jobs, housing, law enforcement interactions, etc. are almost entirely up to you and what you make of them. They can be completely paralyzing or they can be a minor nuisance at worse. The choice is yours. Take ownership of your situation and figure out how to take steps forward to improve your life. The world doesn’t act on you — you act on the world. Get out there and make it happen.

Good luck!

Poor, poor USA. Man I feel for individuals like that and try to understand and show some empathy, but damn he sure makes it hard and not even worth it as there is no reasoning with his mindset. I barely even come on here anymore except to read the post, and low and behold every time I see USA he is insulting and attempting to belittle any and every one on here. Sad dude.

@MikeInSolCal, Thanks Mike its nice to see some positive post on this. And I agree, “Sex offender” does not define who we are. But what we do with our lives is what defines who we are ( i hope that wasn’t a batman pun? ;} ) But its true. I have been blessed with opportunities and made the best of them. I work hard and have a moral work ethic. People notice that and customer react positive to it.
As for law enforcement, they leave me alone. There not like some cities. I feel like there aware of my situation and don’t harass me. I would like to find a place in this county. Its treated right so far.
But there still that feeling deep deep in the soul that things just aren’t right. I feel I’m not whole and I’m sure a lot of us feel that way, even when things are going good. Until we can live without the registry will be a positive. I want people to know that. Those people who are still on the fence about the whole thing.
I’m one of those that had a lot s– thrown at them in life. some self inflected i might add. But somehow was always moving forward. Until now. This has been a very high hurdle to over come
Our Constitution Says we have a right to the pursuit of happiness and ti live in freedom, but we don’t. I’m just saying if where not given these God given, Constitutionally protected rights then I’m a dead man walking. Its just something you feel
But I can tell you have family or friends now. And someday I’ll have them too. I’m keeping my eye on the light at the end of the tunnel. The registry taken away or my final day. Which ever comes first.
But I Am fortunate. God Blessed. :]

I have contacted politicians, “investigative journalists”, family, friends, and many others who give me apathy, sadism, circular logic, or well wishes. They don’t see their lack of civic responsibility and balanced justice is a death knell for their own freedoms in the not-too-distant future.