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Living with 290

Living with 290: The real walking Dead

I have been a RSO for many years now. I have over come so many adversities while growing up with disabilities. When I was young I couldn’t wait to become an adult so I wouldn’t be bullied anymore. I put my self through community college and learned a good trade. Got married and had a family.

And then I did the thing I never thought I couldn’t do. I was one of those. I used to think any one with that type of crime should be hung. I did everything in my power to make it right. But I had a spouse that always held things over my head. My disability leaves me at a disadvantage when it comes to relationships. But I m a dreamiest and I believe in doing what is right.

Pleaded guilty for two years but judge (along my attorney, no help. court appointed) gave me four to twenty years. Got my parole after the four years and two weeks before going home they took it away and gave me two more years (small town prosecutor got a favor of the parole board head guy). Lost my Mom in the four years then My brother in the two years. Never got to see them gain. Finally got out. In that amount of time my spouse was able to turned my kids against me, and my family. I wasn’t even allowed to go back to my town where I was sentenced. I was put into a Motel and still there. Cant rent. But my trade got me making good money. where I live and work shows that not all people are out to destroy you. There are some people that can see who you really are. Ive been trying to find a place to buy since I cant rent. But for respect to those who hate I wont buy where someone my loose home value because I live in the area. I was considered low risk both times when I got paroled.

If the registry is removed I could at least buy and not and not cause any issues where I am at. And also have some of the anxiety and embarrassment reduced. I have enough issues as it is with my disabilities any little bit would help.

So its funny in a way. Now that I’m an adult I wish I was a kid now. They say kids can be cruel, but grownups can be even crueler. I may be breathing and walking but with out Family and friends ( which I don’t have ether) I don’t feel truly alive. I’m the real walking dead. But I pray to God that this registry can be taken away and give us back just a little of our dignity, home and friends.

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  1. General Bean

    Thank you for sharing your story.
    I can relate on a few levels.

    As for buying a house

    “But for respect to those who hate I wont buy where someone my loose home value because I live in the area.”

    Buddy, if they support the registry then they deserve however it affects them, too. Do yourself a favor and buy a house wherever you’ll feel comfortable and be a good neighbor. The best revenge on our detractors, IMHO, is living well!

  2. Eric

    Horrible, heart breaking, and awful…….but typical.

  3. Angel

    My friend just retired to Mexico and she said there is no registration there, if you served your time, then your done. I think only serious aggravated sex offenders should have to register, not ones that pose no risk at the lower levels.

    • Gralphr

      The problem with that is who should be considered a lower level? After all, we have people labeled tier 3 based on the type of conviction alone and not if they truly are dangerous, deserving of the tier level. How can a guy be considered tier 3 if hes been out for 10 or 20 years, crime free? Why should he still be considered dangerous? If anything he should be considered tier 1 or not even be on the registry!

    • John

      The thing about “risk” is that it is a subjective term. Now, our politicians have sold us the notion that risk is based on the Static-99R, which is absolutely absurd. Static-99R scores are only valid from two years after time of release. But politicians, and the Static-99R creators, have perverted the static “test” to extend well past two years after time of release into the community. No “score,” number, and/or “risk factor” can predict human behavior and free will. But, unfortunately, that is the direction that we are headed. And there is no fight against these static test scams.

      • Joe

        “Risk” is hardly a subjective term. “Risk” is a prediction derived from statistical data. A whole science is devoted to it – “Actuarial science is the discipline that applies mathematical and statistical methods to assess risk in insurance, finance and other industries and professions. Actuaries are professionals who are qualified in this field through intense education and experience. In many countries, actuaries must demonstrate their competence by passing a series of thorough professional examinations.”

        The Static-99 computes such risk for a limited period of time. It provides all back-up data – more than I care to remember from statistics class. I am in no position to question the statistical methodology, but that would be the only way to invalidate the instrument.

        As the name would imply it is valid for a limited period of time, based on STATIC factors. It does not, and never has claimed to predict anything beyond that stated period and certainly NOT an entire lifetime, which absolutely is subject to dynamic risk factors (age being the greatest).

        Please read your own post. It is NOT the instrument that is the scam. Its preface still states its limited applicability. It is the “politicians who have perverted the static “test” to extend well past two years after time of release into the community”. YOUR words. (I thought it was 10, but no matter, it was NEVER lifetime).

        What is your motivation for continuously bringing up this mis-characterization on this web site? What would you have us do? I strongly suggest your time is better spent educating the “politicians who have perverted the static “test” to extend well past two years after time of release into the community”. Again, YOUR words.”

        This should help you find your legislators. http://findyourrep.legislature.ca.gov/

        I am nothing if not helpful.

        • Darren R.

          The S-99R Coding Rules literally state that the “estimates” are only valid for two years after release from prison/jail. The Static-99R scam predictions that go five years, ten years, and even more years, out are so misleading because they are from incarceration release. So the Scam 99R is not a dynamic “assessment.” And it is disingenuous for any “expert” to claim otherwise.

        • Dude, Do Your Research

          Not my words. The two year Static-99R validity is literally in the Coding Rules. Page 13: “Static risk assessments estimate the likelihood of recidivism at the time of release and we expect they would be valid for approximately two years.”

          Source: http://static99.org/pdfdocs/Coding_manual_2016_InPRESS.pdf

          The table estimates that show many years prediction, specifically on the ML website, are from time of release. Hence, why the Static-99R is not a dynamic assessment. And why is the “dynamic” SARATSO test (LS/CMI) completely discounted in the tiered registry? Is it because by using a non-transparent sample, and lumping all types of crimes of varying severity, the Static-99R thereby guarantees more “high risk sex offenders,” rationalizing the continuance of a registry, by overestimating? That is why “risk,” at least in the context of the Static-99R, is subjective. Because when the Static-99R lumps all sorts of crimes together, of offenders of varying ages/ethnicities/backgrounds, what exactly is the Static-99R measuring?

          The Static-99R is junk science. And I would ask the very same question of you: Why would one defend what is clearly a glorified crystal ball? A “test,” whose sample is closely guarded as a “trade secret” by its gatekeepers.

    • Will Allen

      Nope. Registries are worthless and shouldn’t exist. Anyone who thinks they should needs to be listed on a hit list.

      • AJ

        @Will Allen:
        ” Anyone who thinks they should needs to be listed on a hit list.”
        —–
        Isn’t that a form of registry? 😛

        • Will Allen

          Yes, I meant the $EX Offender Registries ($ORs) actually, i.e. the hit list.

          Anyone who thinks $ORs are okay should be listed on them and their entire family should be attacked, including their children, grandchildren, etc. Easy test for me.

  4. USA

    I can’t make any judgement! Offense? Arrested for? Situation? Some of us where convicted 20 plus years ago/informed by a paid attorney we would not register once plea reduced to a misdemeanor? Your story is very vague.

    • @USA

      Oh knock it off. WHO THE HELL ARE YOU to make any judgment? Who cares about his offense. It’s in the past! The O.P. obviously has been crime free for several years for a conviction committed as a juvenile! You don’t need to know jack about this individual just like all those pro-registry folks (and I know YOU are one) have zero right to know about him.

    • Rick

      I’m sorry that what you got out of that story was how bad of a crime it must be. I was charged with 1st Deg CSC. Which 95% of all charges start there. Then they reduce it down for a plea deal. Come on man you now how this works. My PSI showed a 26 M prison term. Prosecutor wanted a 3rd Deg for a plea. So to own up and do what was right I said yes to 2 yrs and the third degree. Which we all now if I had a paid attorney they could have gotten it down to a 4th Deg.
      Now on sentencing day was when I heard about a 4yr term even after I entered my plea. But court appointed person to look as if he was an Attorney said nothing. I didn’t know what to do. I had no answers. Here I am a guy from Georgia, in a small Michigan town. how I had planned for two years term now I’m looking at four years. I was going to loose everything. I even showed my attorney court cases where my crime only had gotten a 4th degree. He yelled at me, asked where I got those and walked out mad. a little while later he comes back in and said he made a deal with Judge and they would wait for two weeks before sentencing in order to take care of my business.
      So no I’m not going into details about the crime. And the issue isn’t about what type of charges there was. Its about Not having the right to pursue happiness and to live free. After the fact that so many years and not even a traffic ticket.
      You should hear the story how they took my parole away. Then the Attorney I hired to appeal it took my last 3000 dollars. LOL

    • Joe

      I can make a judgment! Fortunately YOU have been very specific about your offense!

      Offense? FELONY Sexual Battery? Post conviction attitude? These people were hookers and I was addicted to them when I sexually assaulted them, so it is no big deal? Can one be addicted to “hookers”? Like “they” are not people but a substance like nicotine or alcohol! And 20 years later! The same desperate attempt to minimize….. FELONY SEXUAL BATTERY!?

      And now it is the attorney’s fault? A paid one – no less? Just like it was the fault of those paid hookers! I mean, you paid them, after all?

      My thoughts? If anyone deserved a lifetime on the registry (no one should be on it for one second) it is those SEX FELONS with these attitudes 20 years after their felony conviction? Sound about right?

  5. USA

    And? The guy is very vague, takes no responsibility and seems to blame everyone? Yet, he mentions nothing about nothing? Nobody created this issue! People need to start saying, I screwed up, made a bad mistake and screwed my life up! I paid my debt to society/or fulfilled my obligations regarding probation and moved on. Yet, it’s about time the laws change and registration of the lifetime registration needs to be abolished! Get with the program. The guy made a mistake and I wish all the best to him! It sucks

    • Chris f (@ USA)

      Look, I usually just ignore your trolling.

      But I can’t when you so blatantly are either lieing or have issues with basic reading comprehension.

      What part of where he says “I used to think any one with that type of crime should be hung. I did everything in my power to make it right” do you not understand? How in the hell does that mean he “takes no responsibility and seems to blame everyone” ????

      He took responsibility. He plead guilty. He blamed nobody for what he did.

      Unless you have a good explanation or apology this will be the last time I read or respond to anything you post on here again. I don’t have time to waste on trolls.

      • Will Allen

        I almost responded as well but we probably just ought not. Personally, I really believe that USA has some mental problems. Perhaps he is not even close to average intelligence and really struggles with it. I do believe that. So perhaps he is trying to contribute/participate and that is the only way he is able?

        That “takes no responsibility and seems to blame everyone” is straight lying propaganda directly from the “people” who love the Registries. It is the nonsense that they’ll spew 95% of the time. That is what therapists encourage everyone to say to others in group therapy. When they’ve run out of ways to run somebody down, that’s what they say. Same with his “Get with the program” nonsense.

        But perhaps “USA” only understands how to contribute/participate like that? Maybe he is not capable of much more? He cannot clearly articulate thoughts in English. So maybe that’s it? If it is, none of us should attack him. I’m going to continue to try to cut him some slack and just let most of it go. I’ll read the comments sometimes and see if I can get anything useful out of them.

  6. mike r

    Hey USA, damn boring without you here my friend. Lmao…. Where have you been? Licking your wounds from the last bout on here. LOL////

  7. Ghost

    We can see who the spammers are now. Those haters who like take some of these blogs and turn them up side down. to bad there no one to banned these guys.
    The issue is about someone doing there time, pays there restitution and gets off of parole but still has a life sentence. We have people that has a criminal history so long that you can tell that’s all they know to do. And when they get a chance will do it again. But no one can see them. No one knows who they are. Believe me some are sick and need to kept a watch on. But this why rubber stamping everyone coming out with a CSC is bad idea. Take a bath tub. Put black marbles in that show the bad ones, say about 200. Now everyone else on the registry are red. Put those in the tub and stir it up. Now how hard is it to find the black ones. There rubber stamp and the registry does not help.
    And to those haters that always uses those terms ” not taking responsibility” or “Blaming others” when all there trying to do is show the corruption in the legal system. Most cases are over before court even starts. The make deals behind close doors like there trading stock. Favors owed, elections are coming up or just padding the stats to show cases won. So many want to judge others when all they do is stand on the fence line. If more people went through the system and see how it is when its your life on the line ( and some day it could be you) They would turn the “Justice” system around. Our families are being torn apart these days and that is the strength of our county. Any county. But where tearing ours apart.
    There is no perfect way on how to keep an eye on someone. But there shouldn’t be someone always keeping an eye on us. That’s called freedom. And as we little by little keep eroding it away (the frog in a pot story) then we are all doomed.

  8. USA

    The rule of thumb is that extreme reactions and hostile behaviors beyond expectations considered normal in a specific culture point to a personality disorder. I think that you guys are so sick, you don’t even realize it. Who on earth states I would bring my children around prostitutes and we should live in a lawless state because I broke the law? Get help guys. You clearly have both emotional and control issues.

  9. USA

    Yawn! Thank you for all the support. My wobbler was reduced to a misdemeanor and expunged! I was definitely (was) a felon. I clearly don’t watch underage porn, have sex with underage little boys or girls and I don’t wack off to that stuff like many of you! It sounds like many of you are angry that you got caught and one of you stated you want to expose your kids (might have been Lomita post) to prostitutes? I’m concerned.

    • Truth

      Are you some type of Troll on the website? From what I’ve seen on the website is people more angry than anything about the fact they’re on a registry that constantly changes, and they’re singled out for additional punishments, based off false data. Its equivalent to the government making a new law today that says anyone who has ever had a speeding ticket must now follow new laws like mandatory $50 to the government monthly or yearly, must take new classes, and must have some sort of marker for all to see that says they have been caught speeding, all the while saying its not a punishment. Do the crime, then do the time is definitely ok in my eyes, but continued harassment, to the point of the laws looking eerily like old Jim Crow laws or even Nazi Germany (minus the gas chambers) speaks of unconstitutional laws. Remember, SORNA tiers are based on the charge/conviction, NOT if the person is truly dangerous and will commit another sexual crime.

      Last of all, while I too am on the registry, I’m also married and all of my children live with me. Post prison, I obtained a Bachelors degree and have worked in some pretty famous places (such as Eli Lilly and Cedars Sinai), but I can also tell you the number of times I was also relieved of a position due to people finding out I’m on the registry. This is for something that happened 20+ years ago mind you. Considering I been out about 14 years, have custody of my children and have had no other incidents of any type concerning the police, why should I still be considered dangerous!? THAT is what I disagree with! Everyone should have a way off the registry based off their conduct post imprisonment. While I’ll agree you have a few on the website who people like the Books in Florida or John Walsh would love in order to support their agendas, most people on the website leave legitimate and sane posts.

      • Will Allen

        I don’t think USA is actually a troll. I think he just can’t help but interact with people like that. Can’t help it.

        Anyway, very sorry to hear about your troubles. But that is the REAL effect of the Registries.

        There should not be a way for people to get off of the Registries because Registries shouldn’t exist. We have to be stronger and smarter and able to admit that Registries are dumb and have no place in a moral, civilized, advanced society. We know Registries aren’t needed or significantly beneficial. So given that, why do they exist? Who are the “people” keeping them in place that must be defeated?

  10. mike r

    USA again. LMFAO. Remember people, I usually do not like calling out crimes but USA is a self admitted perv that would re-offend if it was not for the registry. He got off on a sexual battery-violent, against a prostitute in a message parlor. He skated with expungement and reduction because we all know that is how the world works. Now he comes on here and lectures and criticizes and points fingers at everyone else. Talk about not taking responsibility. He is a psyco-major. Just saying, lol.

  11. Steveo

    It’s scientifically proven that most registered citizens don’t re-offend. Someone would have to be willfully ignorant to think most people on here are. That might be his situation, but it seems to me that he’s just mad, and wants to attack most people on this site. I’m not sure, but he might have been bullied, or at least feel he was bullied here, or some other place in life, and wants to attack people with no real world consequences to himself. In other words, he can secretly use others for his own desires to be fulfilled… He can tell himself, they deserve it. Sound like familiar behavior?

  12. USA

    You guys clearly fit the cliche of predators. You attack those who don’t follow you? Sound familiar? Will Allen forgot to inform you that they where arrested/convicted of sodomizing an underage boy, twice arrested and has multiple probation violations. No wonder he is angry.

    • New Person

      @USA,

      I am curious if bringing down other people in your convicted class makes you feel better despite you still remaining on the registry that binds you still in that convicted class? This is the only psychological thought process that makes any kind of sense.

      A lot of people have issues. If this is your issue, then it’s just one of many ways people react to being on the registry. It’s a great things sticks and stones was learned long ago. If you need to vent this way to keep your spirits up, then that’s what you gotta do. I don’t agree with it, but I totally understand the thought process behind it.

      I do hope we all get off the registry to help our peace of mind to move forward. The mental restraints to keep one in place whilst everyone around moves onward truly is debilitating because you can see it in real time as opposed to being inside a prison cell as an actual part of your punishment.

  13. Chris f (@USA)

    @USA

    You must have missed my question:

    What part of where he says “I used to think any one with that type of crime should be hung. I did everything in my power to make it right” do you not understand? How in the hell does that mean he “takes no responsibility and seems to blame everyone” ????

    He took responsibility. He plead guilty. He blamed nobody for what he did.

    I look forward to your response of explaining your statements and how you mis interpreted what he said to somehow mean the opposite.

  14. USA

    What about you Steveo? Child porn, child molestation, oral with a minor and how many parole violations? You guys are predators and lash out at those who oppose your views and simply convey a thought? Your angry, hostile, an admitted child predator and Will Allen has admitted that they now (in past comments) they continue their ways, but just more carefully? We have one guy who even stated they would have no issues brining (way out there) children around prostitutes? Are you going to train them as well? Remember, people read your sick comments. You are truly real life predators who seem to have a lot of time on your hands and seem to be out looking for your next fix! Go ahead and write a 20 page response, but I’m going to work. Get some help! Get healthy and STOP being defensive. Learn to listen!

    • Curiouser

      Someone gave you a job? Dayum!
      (Sorry guys…I couldn’t resist).

    • Will Allen

      @USA:

      Will Allen has admitted no such thing, although committing crimes would be the perfect retaliation against the Registries. I did say that I would not have a problem with my children being around prostitutes. You seem to have trouble understanding that has nothing to do with $EX or drugs. Meh. The fact is that I expect that most prostitutes are very likely a LOT less judgmental people than are the idiots who support Registries or prostitution being illegal. I expect that prostitutes are a lot more moral and better people as well. I don’t want my children around “people” who think Registries are okay. Those “people” are awful, immoral, and dangerous.

      I’m sorry that you have such extreme mental issues. I really am. I wish you could change your disposition to have better conversations with people. I wish you could basically comprehend what people say and be able to effectively communicate your thoughts to other people. But you can’t. I am sorry about that. I don’t expect I’ll be communicating much with you. I don’t actually think you are a troll, I think you really just can’t do any better.

  15. mike r

    @ Will, ” I really believe that USA has some mental problems. Perhaps he is not even close to average intelligence and really struggles with it. I do believe that. So perhaps he is trying to contribute/participate and that is the only way he is able?”

    You stated this before and I agreed and still do. IDK why, but I feel sorta sorry for him. He must not have anyone or anything in life that he truly cares about or that cares about him. The sad part is that he supposedly has 4 degrees, albeit in pseudo science psychology, and this makes him think that he is somehow superior to others or has the ability to psychoanalyze individuals and feels nothing is wrong with himself. My ex-wife is the same way, she thinks she is above others because she has a masters in psych when she is one of the stupidest people I have ever met with absolutely no common sense whatsoever. So, people don’t let USA’s rants get you angry, he is a troll without enough intelligence to communicate effectively with others so he resorts to hate tactics. Like I have stated before, there is nothing he can say as he is a self admitted re-offender if it was not for him being on the registry. And he is probably one of the ones who will be getting relief, that should worry the message parlor employees at minimum.

  16. USA

    I’m not surprised by how much control I have over you! Mike R has shown he is unable to deal with other views or opinions. You have exhibited ALL of the personality traits common among sex offenders! I hung a tiny carrot and you showed the poor impulse control that’s made you the repeat child molester you are! Your anger, desire to belittle and wanting to put others down confirms all of this. I hope that your lashing out and desire to belittle your victims helps. Pleaseeeee get help. Your clearly way more intelligent then myself (search for the typos/grammar errors on this blog) to support your superior yourself. Deep down, your a very insecure little man

    • AJ

      @USA:
      A number of months back, at least three times I requested your thoughts on how to improve and/or fight the registry and all associated with it. To my dismay, you never replied. Perhaps now, with some time for further thought and development of ideas, you can share them. I would appreciate hearing your thoughts.

  17. mike r

    Serious issues USA, for having any degrees let alone 4 you could not be more wrong with your diagnosis. Your pseudoscience is just that. Your education and degrees are a joke. You are a joke. And I have to remind myself, mentally challenged. But that is no excuse as there is nothing wrong with being mentally challenged, it’s who you are as a person matters. You are definitely no one I would want to know.

    “Your clearly way more intelligent then myself (search for the typos/grammar errors on this blog)”
    You clearly do not even know what makes someone intelligent, it sure as hell is not typos or not.

  18. mike r

    @USA states, “to inform you that they where arrested/convicted”====”to support your superior yourself”

    Typos, lmfao…. By your own measurement you are not the sharpest tool in the shed I guess.

  19. USA

    As noted, Mike R sounds obsessed with defending himself. Notice he didn’t defend the fact that is a multiple/repeat pedophile? Disturbing.

    • Curiouser

      And what are you? A felony sexual batterer? How does this any better than the rest of us? Most of your posts spell out, ad nauseam, that you ONLY suffered one conviction, which has since been reduced and expunged. Congratulations. I am also reduced and expunged. And guess what? Just like you, I’m STILL registering. As far as I’m concerned, you can have any opinion you want to have, no matter how inane. You seem to take issue with anyone whose offense involved a minor, and have spent a great deal of time distinguishing your offense from theirs. That’s fine. Have at it. I support your right to speak your piece. But don’t be all butt-hurt when some one rips you apart when you do so, because the fact is, this is a one-size-fits-all registry. You’re no better than the rest of us.

  20. steve

    I will not get sucked into this, I will not get sucked into this. Repeat and rinse.

    • James I

      LOL…@Steve:

      Grin and I’m with you brother….I took a deep breath of air, stepped back and went out to purposely avoid saying anything at all….lol…(there’s got to be a better way forward…for all of us).

      Best Wishes, James I

    • Will Allen

      LOL, you are smarter than the rest of us.

    • AJ

      @steve:
      Aside from my recent post encouraging he-who-shall-remain-unnamed to share thoughts, I too am stepping away and back. It’s so incredibly tempting to jump in, but no. In fact, the thought has crossed my mind that perhaps we’re the object of his “release”, so to speak. Perhaps we’re his new porn–he seems to have a hard time staying away, even though we’re all so unredeemable and vile.

      • Josh

        @AJ…..I think you hit on the heart of the matter. It’s that kind of attention seeking that causes people to lash out. There’s obviously something lacking and acting out gets you reactions positive & negative but attention none the less. It’s like he comes on here, lobs out something incendiary and then sees who he “hooks”……I haven’t been interested in getting into it either because somebody gently reminded me not to feed the wildlife…

  21. R M

    OMG people…. please stop it with the personal attacks and accusations. Use your time and energy to fight FOR us, not AGAINST us.

  22. Chris F (@USA for 3rd time)

    Ok, USA, this is the 3rd time I am posting this without a response. If you are as intelligent as you say I would think you could actually respond and help us understand how you interpret things differently than everyone else.

    Here it is again:

    @USA

    You must have missed my question:

    What part of where he says “I used to think any one with that type of crime should be hung. I did everything in my power to make it right” do you not understand? How in the hell does that mean he “takes no responsibility and seems to blame everyone” ????

    He took responsibility. He plead guilty. He blamed nobody for what he did.

    I look forward to your response of explaining your statements and how you mis interpreted what he said to somehow mean the opposite.

    • MikeInSoCal

      I don’t want to be lumped in with USA because there seem to be issues there, but just reading through this one time, I’m definitely left with the sense that OP blames his spouse, his disability, and the system for all of his problems. OP is surely going through a very hard time right now and I think all of us have had moments where things feel hopeless and it feels like the system is rigged against us, but I don’t think USA is completely out of line to suggest that OP is blaming others for his situation.

      • New Person

        @MikeinSoCal,

        While USA did identify the OP is distributing blame away, it wasn’t what USA was initially after. USA wants knowledge of the crime to make himself feel superior. The blaming everyone else bit is probably one of those psychological processes our minds go through, to which the OP may need help. The OP did write this piece, which is a call for help b/c the OP is feeling helpless.

        I can’t speak for the OP, but trying to move forward only for the government to keep you in-place isn’t great for the mental state. Registering on or around your birthday is very Clockwork Orange-ish. If you’re a registrant, then you share the same plight as everyone on the registry. How you got onto the registry is irrelevant b/c once you’re on it, then you’re no longer an equal citizen – you’re deliberately made into a sub-citizen, a US Gov’t caste system. How we chose to pick each other up may vary, but trying to find how you got onto the registry is akin to someone in prison asking for your papers. Does it really matter if you’re all in the same prison?

  23. mike r

    Man you are really gone USA,
    “Serious issues USA, for having any degrees let alone 4 you could not be more wrong with your diagnosis.”
    Think that kind of refuted everything you stated. Everything about me and my offense is online and out there in my court docs I have filed. I am done with him people……. Dude is to far gone to reach….

  24. USA

    Stalkers, I have 5 degrees pedophile possy

    • Josh

      @USA…….
      P o s s e………if you’re going to insult us will you please spell it properly. Obviously none of your 5 degrees is in English or spelling…….new material would be welcome as well. Sorry @AJ….I couldn’t help myself

  25. New York Level 1

    I think USA has an overwhelming urge to think of himself as “separate” or “unique” from quote-unquote sex offenders.

    Unfortunately, that is not objectively true, and society sure as hell doesn’t see it as true either.

    USA, you will find inner peace and serenity when you accept that you are one of us, and the particulars of your specific case cannot put you in a position of higher moral authority or cleanliness.

  26. MikeInSoCal

    To the OP:
    I’ve been in your shoes. I remember being paroled and being stuck in a run down motel because I had no other options. I have both good and bad news: Things will be exactly as you believe. I know a ton of sex offenders who have absolutely shitty lives. They live in group homes, have no friends or family, do nothing with their lives, etc.
    But, I also know plenty of people for whom being on the registry doesn’t even impact their daily life in the slightest.
    But, it is 100% up to you. It is NOT up to the state/country repealing the registry. Get that nonsense out of your head. It’s probably not going to ever happen. Can changes be made? Sure. The team here does a great job advocating for us in court, but we are NOWHERE NEAR getting the registry removed. So, if you base your hope on that, you’re going to have problems.
    Just accept that the registry is what it is and move on. Renting is an option. I’ve done it. Many other RSOs have as well. Buying is also an option but not if you live in fear of maybe kinda sorta bothering someone or affecting their property value. Get this idea of ‘respect’ for some vague potential neighbor and decide that you’re going to respect yourself enough to do what is best for you.
    Jobs, housing, law enforcement interactions, etc. are almost entirely up to you and what you make of them. They can be completely paralyzing or they can be a minor nuisance at worse. The choice is yours. Take ownership of your situation and figure out how to take steps forward to improve your life. The world doesn’t act on you — you act on the world. Get out there and make it happen.

    Good luck!

    • Will Allen

      Hmmm, calling people “sex offenders”, I kind of feel like you are good with the Registries.

      I do agree with most of what you said though. I could see living life without it affecting you much, and certainly not daily. But it will affect you if you try to travel at all. Then you are subject to all sorts of Jim Crow laws. Telling people here and there where you are going, and literally all for no good, sensible, or fair reasons whatsoever.

      If these criminal regimes that had these Registries would do just a couple of simple things, I expect I could ignore them. They should:

      1. Change the Registries so that the people listed on them have zero obligations to do anything at any time. The criminal regime would be responsible for collecting and maintaining whatever data it wanted to and publishing it. A Registered Person would do nothing, ever.

      2. Whatever was done for $EX offenses would also be done for ALL significant crimes. All of them. Everyone would be able to look up murderers, manslaughterers, home invaders, drunk drivers, child abusers, assaulters, you name it.

      If the criminal regimes could do just those 2 very simple, fair things then they might have some credibility and not be so criminal. But all that would take some actual work so I don’t think they are up for it.

      But your “minor nuisance at worse” statement is completely wrong.

      • MikeInSoCal

        I’m not “good with registries” but I realize they aren’t going anywhere. You can not like them and still see the obvious writing on the wall that they aren’t going anywhere. You might want there to be no obligations with registries and/or have a registry for all offenses, but that is not close to a reality in the society we live in. Whether that makes the country a “criminal” enterprise or not is really incidental to me.

        I’m just sharing my experience being on the registry for 10 years now. It’s an extremely minor nuisance. One day a year I have to spend 20 minutes with the local PD. So what. I’ve done a Bahamas cruise and have another one coing up in November. I’ve flown to Denmark and visited several Schengen countries. Do we have added burdens? Yep. But you can spend all of your time and energy being bothered by those or you can just accept that they are part of your new normal and move forward. I choose to move forward.

        But, I will give you one point: Not bothered by the term “sex offender”. I’ve been called a lot worse. As it relates to the law, RSO is the term that we get. I don’t go around town introducing myself that way, but when I talk about the burdens imposed by the state, I find the term fitting. If that bothers someone, I’m sorry, but the reason I’m posting is not so I can find a term that everybody loves. The reason I’m posting is because the OP is clearly going through a hard time and he needs to realize that his life is only over IF he lets it be over. He has two choices right now: roll over and be a victim or he can reach up and grab life by the balls. He already has a good job, so there’s a huge step in the right direction. But, all of this ‘woe is me’ talk that permeates this forum is not healthy for people.

        • New Person

          @ MikeinSoCal,

          Awesome job on moving forward. I like reading positive responses as it can give others a different perspective and hope within the registry. Sadly, I’m still trying to breakthrough. I’m at that stage of finding the correct filament that can make a light bulb work.

          I still believe the registry can be taken down b/c it’s as terrible as the Jim Crow laws, except this isn’t a “Separate, but Equal” issue. It’s a “Separate, and second class citizen” issue. Some one or group will expose this and it’s important that it is exposed to reveal how terrible humanity can still be.

        • Will Allen

          I’m glad the Registries aren’t much trouble for you. But I’m also sure you know they’ve imposed some really unacceptable burdens on some other people (e.g. recent person talking about not attending children’s school events). I do like the idea that people should realize that all kinds of people have all kinds of trouble in life and the Registries can be greatly minimized to be not so big in comparison. I do like the idea that people should never have a “woe is me” attitude and feel like a victim.

          But this “minor nuisance” talk is offensive. I get that you are just talking about your personal experience and it is great to honest. I assume there is so limit as to what you would allow the criminal regime to do to you before you did not just accept it as “part of your new normal”? What would make a regime criminal to you? If they passed “laws” that only affected you and not even more deserving people? If they did so without even worrying about facts? If they did so with no concern of the effectiveness or any other outcome?

          I’ve said it before on here numerous times – I’ve been very successful and it would be pretty easy for me just “accept” the Registries. But I’ve had multiple decades of a “new normal” and I’m not interested in accepting any of it. I’ll accept people minding their own fucking business. So I can ignore it or I can fight. Personally, I think buildings should burn and people should die. That is how strongly I feel about it. I’m sure the criminal regimes would love it if everyone just accepted it, instead of 80% of the people.

  27. mike r

    Poor, poor USA. Man I feel for individuals like that and try to understand and show some empathy, but damn he sure makes it hard and not even worth it as there is no reasoning with his mindset. I barely even come on here anymore except to read the post, and low and behold every time I see USA he is insulting and attempting to belittle any and every one on here. Sad dude.

  28. Ghost

    @MikeInSolCal, Thanks Mike its nice to see some positive post on this. And I agree, “Sex offender” does not define who we are. But what we do with our lives is what defines who we are ( i hope that wasn’t a batman pun? ;} ) But its true. I have been blessed with opportunities and made the best of them. I work hard and have a moral work ethic. People notice that and customer react positive to it.
    As for law enforcement, they leave me alone. There not like some cities. I feel like there aware of my situation and don’t harass me. I would like to find a place in this county. Its treated right so far.
    But there still that feeling deep deep in the soul that things just aren’t right. I feel I’m not whole and I’m sure a lot of us feel that way, even when things are going good. Until we can live without the registry will be a positive. I want people to know that. Those people who are still on the fence about the whole thing.
    I’m one of those that had a lot s– thrown at them in life. some self inflected i might add. But somehow was always moving forward. Until now. This has been a very high hurdle to over come
    Our Constitution Says we have a right to the pursuit of happiness and ti live in freedom, but we don’t. I’m just saying if where not given these God given, Constitutionally protected rights then I’m a dead man walking. Its just something you feel
    But I can tell you have family or friends now. And someday I’ll have them too. I’m keeping my eye on the light at the end of the tunnel. The registry taken away or my final day. Which ever comes first.
    But I Am fortunate. God Blessed. :]

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