Living with 290: How to make friends and meet people

I will be thirty five in about a month and a half. From time to time I reflect on my life so far. The good, bad, indifferent, mundane, thrilling, and horrifying moments alongside what I chose to do, what was chosen for me, and what I’ve not done. While I was looking forward to making some significant life changes in 2020 the pandemic has put many of those on hold. Last night at work during a zoom meeting one of my co-workers said he planned to go on an in…

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Living with 290: Brothers and Sisters in Pain

What did I do to deserve a life sentence of pain? My motive rejected, judged my behavior a crime. Stunned at the devastating repercussions of my action. The act complete, my destiny sealed, my life shattered. The impact crushed my identity, an annihilation of my worth. The alarming, unreal raid, a SWAT team brandishing assault rifles. Or a subtle summon to appear before a biased, hardened judge. My life ending, my family, friends, church condemning. My reality, years of painful imprisonment, penetrating shame. Alone, I mulled over and over again…

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Living with 290: Dismissals Disregarded

Back in the mid 90’s I met a women. I was 28 and she was 31. We soon developed a passionate love affair. We even lived together but never married. She had odd behavior though. One minute she would be caring and attentive, the next minute she would erupt in violence and yelling. Any man with sound judgement would have broken off this relationship. I didn’t and I paid dearly. Two years into our romance she was again acting very odd at a dinner theatre we attended together. She said…

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Living with 290: Wife not allowed in country

After 11 years of marriage we spent the last two, trying to get my wife allowed in the US from the Philippines. I am retired and she is 9 years my younger. We have no children and we lived together until the USCIS quoted the Adam Walsh Act and denied my wife entry. The case was a consensual case, but i took the plea deal, served no prison and six month in county. No recommendations for ” rehabilitation” in file as i am not a predator . One crime in…

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Living with 290: The Polygraph is Pure Hocus Pocus

If anyone does not know, the California Sex Offender Management Board (aka CASOMB) has phone call conferencing open to the public. Well since I’m not only a registrant but a member of the public I thought I’d conference in on their call today about the polygraph and all its wonderness and goodness fantasticness. What I heard today was a lot of 100% USDA Ground Choice B.S. unfortunately. A lot of Orwellian Doublespeak (1984 book) also present. There were CASOMB people on the call, a few PO’s, and, you guessed it,…

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Living with 290: Jim Crow Redux

Being a registrant for the past 34 years because of a plea deal on a misdemeanor in California, I find it very disheartening to see such non-uniformity in the administration of justice with sex offenses. If I didn’t have a disabled wife to caretake for I would move to a state where there’s more leniency. I live in Arizona where my city is one of two in the nation barring registrants from city-operated parks and facilities. They named this ordinance the “Safe Parks ordinance”. Granted, there are waivers available through…

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Living with 290: The real walking Dead

I have been a RSO for many years now. I have over come so many adversities while growing up with disabilities. When I was young I couldn’t wait to become an adult so I wouldn’t be bullied anymore. I put my self through community college and learned a good trade. Got married and had a family. And then I did the thing I never thought I couldn’t do. I was one of those. I used to think any one with that type of crime should be hung. I did everything…

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Living with 290: Cleaning Up Your Online Reputation After Ending Registration

Hello ACSOL community. This is Free Again (a.k.a. Anonymous OP a.k.a. Newly Liberated…I figured that the second screen name will eventually no longer apply once enough time has passed, so I changed it once again). As I had mentioned under the previous CoR post, I am contributing this new follow-up post that will focus solely on cleaning up your online reputation once you have been relieved of your duty to register. Please note, however, that there are some websites from which you can opt out whether or not you’re currently…

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Living with 290: U.S. Border Policies and Sex Offense Registration Killed My Love

Three weeks ago, my fiancé’s brother texted me saying that my fiancé, “Eric”, was killed in El Salvador. I cannot express how stunned, sad, and angry I am about my Love’s needless death. Eric grew up in America after his parents brought him, at age five, to the U.S.A. I was both his kindergarten and third grade teacher. Later, when he was a young man, to my regret and shame, Eric became the underaged so-called “victim” in my sex offense case. My psychologist reported us. I was given a one-year…

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Living with 290: Early Discharge from Parole Granted

I wanted to share an experience that might provide everyone a better idea of the current climate in the California CDCR Parole arena. I was just approved for an early discharge from parole and have an appointment to go in tomorrow to have my ankle monitor removed and be officially discharged. The plea deal I took, for a 288(a) L&L w/child under 14 included a 6 year prison term at 85% and 3 years of parole. When I was released, I was informed that my parole was now 10 years…

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Living with 290: Success Story – Certificate of Rehabilitation and Removal from the CA Registry

I want to share a success story of overcoming the confines of being a registrant, and the practical steps I took. Of course, every case is different. On February 22, 2018, I was granted a Certificate of Rehabilitation and relieved of the duty of having to register. After 11 years, the oppression was lifted just like that. After I gathered my jaw from the floor, I went down to the court cafeteria and just sat there. Pondering what just happened and the new possibilities. I was convicted of an “Attempted…

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Living with 290: Certificate of Rehabilitation – 2019 (Updated)

UPDATE 2/23: Removal from the Registry (below) Original Submission 2/9: Last month, I received my Certificate or Rehabilitation, thus ending my duty to register and bringing to a conclusion a decade filled with challenges and a sense of utter hopelessness and despair. When this all began, I asked myself repeatedly, “How am I ever going to get out of this?” At my first ACSOL meeting (before it was called ACSOL), the dim feeling of hope I felt that day was still overshadowed by this vague and ominous sense of doubt.…

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Living with 290: Finding Work

I was convicted in federal court of distribution and possession of child pornography in January 2008. I was sentenced to 151 months, which, after good time, was a little under 11 years. I was released from prison in June 2018 and sent to a halfway house in Indiana, about three hours from my home. While there, I was encouraged to work, because you have to pay them part of it, but I actually wanted to work so I obtained a job at a local factory through the halfway house. In…

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Living with 290: Not above the law

No one is above the law. Punish me for the crimes I committed, but obey the law yourselves in doing so. I was told they wanted to ask me some questions, just for basic information and said that I didn’t have to talk to them if I did not want to. I could go outside, but then I could not come back inside, because they couldn’t have me going out and coming in while they were working. This is their only pass at compliance with Miranda. From my own research,…

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Living with 290: No More use of the term “Sex Offender”

I would like to ask and insist that we all stop, that is STOP using the words “sex offender.”  It’s pejorative, demeaning, and keeps the idea that registrants keep “offending.”  Word use is VERY IMPORTANT in our cause – and the words we choose to use make people either cringe or open their minds. Just like any other racial or otherwise de-humanizing words, and we know what those words are, continuing to use them keeps up the hate, the fear, and the political rhetoric.  Let us choose BETTER words because…

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Living with 290: 8 years and how many left?

I decided to write this because I just graduated college. I have been fighting and fighting and fighting some more with this nonsense hanging over my head. I have been denied jobs because of my sex offender status, I have felt like killing myself, and I sometimes just feel hopeless. I was convicted of a 289a1 or Penetration of a foreign object through force or fear. I was 20 at the time and I was at a party. I hooked up with this girl and the lines got blurred between…

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AK: Personal rights and stigma: when and where can sex offenders participate in the community? (Opinion)

[KBBI Alaska] Towns across Alaska have to grapple with what to do once a known sex offender returns to the community after serving their punishment. Though there are clear limits in some areas, there are massive gray zones, as well. Residents in Homer are struggling to balance fairness with safety ahead of one of the Kenai Peninsula’s biggest celebrations.   Read more  

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