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ACSOL’s Online EPIC Conference: Empowered People Inspiring Change Sept 17-18, 2021

Janice's Journal

Janice’s Journal: A Man Committed Suicide

After being arrested for possession of child pornography, a man committed suicide yesterday.  We can only speculate why he would commit such a desperate act. Was it because he was also charged with “exchanging sexually explicit messages with a teen in California”?  Was it because he was a member of law enforcement, a deputy sheriff in Florida?

It is likely that we will never know his reason why.

What we do know, however, is that many others have chosen the same path.  That is, many men have committed suicide because they could not or would not live their lives burdened by the label “sex offender”.

These extreme acts are to be viewed with compassion and understanding.  For the people who committed them – our brothers, sons, nephews and husbands — did so because of the extreme duress borne by each and every person whose name, photo and home address are posted on a sex offender registry.

Their duress comes in many forms – underemployment or unemployment, homelessness, isolation from family, social stigma and/or vigilante violence.

Suicide under these circumstances is understandable.  However, we cannot and should not sit idly by.  Instead, it’s up to us to change these circumstances, to give men who have already paid their debt to society what they deserve — an opportunity to live in peace, to enjoy their families and to contribute their talents to society.

It’s up to us to Show Up – Stand Up – Speak Up.  There are many opportunities to do so during the next month as we oppose legislation in Sacramento on June 21 and June 28, educate ourselves in Los Angeles on July 16 and protest the International Megan’s Law in Oakland on July 27.  Please join us by honoring those who have fallen as well as providing a better life for those who remain.

 

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hell yes lets push back ! sick of this sitting idle ,

I commit to come to Sacramento to fight both bills. And I commit to come to Oakland. Maybe YOU are an RC like me, and maybe–like me–you are not directly affected by either of these bills, and don’t plan on traveling internationally. You and I could say “Let others waste time writing letters and making calls for bills that don’t affect me.” But the reality is that we are all in this together. If we only fight bills that affect each of us personally, our response will be weak and make little difference in the outcome. But if all of… Read more »

Thanks Janice, I know deep in my heart lives come and go, but I cannot count the many RC’s or unregistered that have taken their own and just cannot stand it anymore. Now, those of you, ask yourselves, you are now survivors, but how we have thought the same when on the Inside (prison walls, for those that were incarcerated longer than over a year), have thought or came close to carrying it out, to leave this world not seeing any light or any future beyond those walls. Many. I am thankful for those that have endured their incarceration and… Read more »

I lament that this officer lost his Courage in the sight of Perpetual Punishment & a Unforgetting Unforgiving road that he would be forced to travel on, no matter what actions he could take for paying the debt he owed he’s fellow countrymen. As a Peace Officer he surely was a first hand eyewitness to the uncompassionate treatment for those who have been marked Unredeemable. How futile their efforts at making a willing and sincere recompense in order to merit a position of a example to others of which dark paths to avoid in life. In order to revive righteousness… Read more »

I think he made the right choice in killing himself. The right choice for himself, his family, friends and his employer. A choice I have tried to have the courage to make, yet I cannot. A police officer who kills himself when charged with a sex crime only helps the rest of us by focusing on just how devastating living life as a sex offender can be. Instead of being forced to choose to support him and remain in his life as a sex offender in Florida, his family only now needs to bury him and mourn him, then move… Read more »

I’m sorry you feel that way, Renny. I personally wouldn’t give them the satisfaction. Dying alone is no way to go…. taking a few wholes with you, now that’s class. lol just kidding. I shouldn’t make light.

Renny, I concur fully with you following statement.

I challenge all of us to find out when our local jurisdictions hold their annual registrations and go in there and pass out a business card with the CARSOL website address on one side and the list of their victories on the other.

It is a simple & effective step to build on. Informing & educating those being directly persecuted.

This is really not a bad idea…the Business Cards with CARSOL contact info on the front, Victories on the back. It is not intrusive to other RSO’s, but also would clue them in. The problem is that in CA we each have to register within 5 days of our birthdays and so there is no generalized date for people to show up…and thus be able to pass them out. However, there are people on this Forum that are thinking of doing some targeted mailing and putting several such Business Cards in the mailing envelope might not be a bad idea.… Read more »

Suicide is a viable and dignified alternative to the public pillory provided in the U.S. even for minimal infractions considered sexual in nature.
No doubt it will become a federal offense to commit suicide for citizens accused of a sexual offense, in order to make sure that they cannot circumvent the humiliation the government has in store fore them.
And, in the customary manner, it will not be considered a punitive provision, but rather a regulation that furthers an important government objective.

The one thing that I have learned after becoming an RSO is having empathy and compassion for others. Hearing anyone take their lives over being convicted of an SO is sad, even if he was a police officer. I can only assume that he had a family, friends, and loved ones who cared for him. There is always an impact upon others and not just about the one who took their own life. There have been many times where I thought I was coming close to taking my own life over being convicted of a SO; yet, I have an… Read more »

You know, trust me, it crosses my mind often. I see a reason to live that trumps the thought. I cannot fathom my son not being without me. Period. I cannot fathom having the love from my “wife”. There are more important reasons to live. He was narcissistic.

“Maybe his death brought about attention to the travesty of what being labeled does…” I it doubt John, the way the public reaction to RC, they would like to see more.

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